The Circle Back Exercise.
Identify three instances from the recent past when a loved one came to you with a complaint or challenge.
Consider addressing that situation now by saying:
“Do you remember when you told me about_____”
“And I said_____”
“Can I have the opportunity to do that over?”
“What I realize now is that I wish I would have/should have said____.”
“I can imagine you feel____”
“Because” (X3)
Validate (Convey understanding of their experience: I could understand)
Support: Practical (Comfort/connection, feeling heard)
Support: Emotional (Teach skills, set a limit, work together to brain-storm solution / solve the practical problems)
“Thanks for letting me share this with you.”
*If they get angry or try to take care of you (blast or denial) validate that.